In her book, Untamed, Glennon Doyle says, “The braver I am, the luckier I get.”
I have been clinging to this quote big time over the last few weeks. During this time in isolation I have found myself with ample time to reflect and dig into my spirit. It’s not that I was necessarily unhappy with my life before, but having much less distraction and noise in my life has allowed me to hear my dreams and desires more clearly.
This hard time has also reminded me of the strength and courage I have to go after those dreams.
So my dream, in a nutshell, comes down to my personal mission that I have redefined during this time. I’ve had more space to hear myself and to hear God within myself. I have this deep confidence in who I am like I haven’t had in a while.
I believe I am here to help others restore healthy relationships with their bodies, minds, and souls so they can flourish as the freest version of themselves.
Ah it feels so good to put that out into the universe.
I believe I do this work in a few ways – through CycleBar, my pursuit of degrees in Divinity and Counseling, and through my writing. But one area that has struck me in a way that hasn’t been honoring to the person I want to become is how I’ve been treating my relationship with food and alcohol during this time of crisis.
Things are really really hard right now, there is no getting around it, and in the midst of such difficulty, I have found myself depending on food and alcohol more than usual. I have seen it as something I need in order to feel better. I need it as something to numb the pain of our current collective suffering. I eat because I’m bored. Or stressed. Or anxious. Then I feel guilty for eating what I did or drinking more than I wanted to and it has been leading to increased mood swings, way more acne, and many restless nights of sleep.
So when my friend Peterson texted me last week asking if I wanted to do the Arbonne 30 Days to Healthy Living Program with him, I was hesitant at first…but after doing my research and engaging God in discernment, it was an easy answer – YES.
I had already been learning about habits last week and the conviction to make positive changes regarding my relationship with food, especially during this time, was already on my mind. I was reading Gretchen Rubin’s book Better Than Before where she describes the four personalities one might identify with regarding habits. I self-identified as an obliger meaning I need external accountability if I am going to stick to a habit, or really anything in life! Deadlines and other people counting on me WORK for me. So I honestly saw it as a huge blessing from above that Peterson had reached out about this because I knew I couldn’t do it alone.
So am I embarking on this healthy living adventure for the sole purpose of losing weight? Not exactly. Am I doing it because I want to improve and positively change my relationship with food and alcohol? Yes! Am I hoping I will see positive changes such as better sleep, clearer skin, and more energy as a result of this? Yes and yes! My attitude about most self-imposed challenges in life is why not? If it’s not for me, then it’s not for me. But I won’t know unless I try.
I’m excited. I’m ready to dive into it. I’m ready for positive change. I know it’s going to be tough, but I’m grateful that I am being brave in saying yes to this possibly life-changing opportunity.