Today, one of my professors performed an act of courage and vulnerability in our class and it inspired me to pop back on here and just write. It inspired me to write without fear of what others will think because let’s be real, that fear is real and it holds me back a lot more than I want to admit.
My professor got me thinking about my motivation behind what I do and how often it can be for my own glory and praise. I want to be great. I want to be affirmed, to be popular, to be successful…the MOST successful. And at times, as a 2 on the Enneagram #helper, my motivations to help others are way more self-centered than I’d ever want to admit.
So, let’s talk Instagram. I was taking my afternoon scroll through and realized that they did away with the numbers…it simply just said “and others” liked a post instead of the exact digits. BOOM hit the conviction when I realized how freeing it was to be released by the pressure of the numbers game. Only when it was taken away did I realize how much I depended on it for my worth. I realized how much of a motivation the numbers played in why I even shared in the first place. And I realized how I ooooh and awe over people who have x amount of likes because that MUST mean that they are successful and loved.
So I have two thank you’s to share today. One is to my professor who inspired me to get back out here and write and share and be free from that fear. The second is to Instagram for convicting me of my pride and freeing me from the temptation to make what I share all about me. Numbers on a screen will never determine how loved you are or how worthy you are. That truth comes from within. That truth comes from the unshakeable, perfect love of God.